The Way I See It
March/11/2008 07:08 PM Filed in: Personality Types | Coffee | Nicole Hanratty | Life of a Rock Star | Humor | Satire
by Nicole Hanratty
Good morning coffee drinkers! I know you’re up, caffeinated and ready to start the day.
Here’s a little something for you to nibble on while you pour that next cup.
Recently I completed a pain-staking study* contemplating the different types of coffee drinkers** and I am just brewing to share my very unscientific non-factual completely not concrete findings*** with you!****
After much analysis it became evident that there are several different types of coffee drinkers all of which correlate with a specific personality type. Read on, and find out where you fit in.
One Cup a Day Drinker - Naturally perky and high on life. Usually downs a quick espresso first thing in the morning. Runs a minimum of three miles per day while smiling and waving at those he/she passes on the trail. General do-gooder.
One Pot a Morning Drinker - Early riser, needs to consume 64 oz before eyes open and more than a friendly grunt is uttered from his/her lips.
One Pot a Day Drinker - Meanders back and forth throughout the day to the same pot of coffee that has been brewing all day. Does not care how bitter it has become. Uses the sharp taste of the coffee to remind him/her self of the sacrifices one must make to succeed in life.
I’ll Have Whatever You’re Making - Complete passive-aggressive. Really wants what he/she wants, but pretends that he/she doesn’t want to put you to any trouble by asking you to make a certain type of coffee just for him/her.
In Line at 5:30 a.m. Every Day at Coffee Bean - Suffers from OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder). Loves to go where everybody knows his/her name.
In Line at 8:30 a.m. Every Day at Starbucks - Loves to be social and be part of the scene. Enjoys drama and feeds off of interaction.
Didn’t find your self within one of these groups? Just consider yourself the independent type.
Au revoir for now... n
Copyright Nicole Hanratty 2008
*I had to give up a whole afternoon of shopping! Devastating, I know.
**No animals were given caffeine and no side effects of drinking caffeine were included in the making of this story. ***This article is specifically not promoting caffeine drinking nor does the author take responsibility for the psychological effects that this information may have on any or all of its readers.
****The author was drinking decaf at the time of composure.
